Friday, April 24, 2015

Trusting God

I haven't been sharing updates because things have been going pretty good and haven't been different until recently AND I have been keeping quite busy. Last week I noticed that the tumor seemed different. Wasn't sure if the size had changed but the position definitely did. So when I went in for the port flush, they ended up drawing blood for the tumor marker number to be done. We won't have that result until next week or even the following week since they have to ship it out to a different lab. The doctor also felt it important to order a PET scan to be done to see if there are any new areas that have cancer cell activity.

If nothing else shows up, I will probably be advised to have a mastectomy done to remove the original tumor. If something else shows up, different treatment discussion will probably take place. And then there is still another, off the wall, miraculous thing that I feel is in the works of manifesting and that would be that the tumor is actually gone, no spots show up in the bones or anywhere else AT ALL. Then I'm not sure what kind of thing they will come up with. I am scheduled for the PET scan in Green Bay on Wednesday the 29th and then an appointment with my doctor following the scan to get the results.

Here's how I've learned to pray about this situation & it can be slightly changed for many situations when praying:

I speak death to this invasive ductile carcinoma cancer. I curse it and command it to leave. God, I speak the life that You’ve already put on the inside of me. I release it to flow through my body.” 

I'd be lying if I said I am completely at ease but for the most part, I feel calm and trust that no matter what news comes to us on Wednesday, that God loves me and will take care of me just like he has told me on different occasions. Here are some things he has told me that I am holding on to. He tore out the root and will take care of the rest. He has cleansed me as white as snow. And so on. I put my trust in God. He's got this!

Remember how I said that I started reading the Bible chronologically last year. Well, I'm fairly close to being finished but for the last few days I was stuck on a small passage in Matthew 15 about the woman that was asking Jesus to heal her daughter that was possessed.  This same story can be found in Mark 7 as well.  Here is an excerpt I found from

Jesus said unto her, Let the children first be filled: for it is not meet to take the children's bread, and to cast it unto the dogs.
Mark 7:27

This was a strong statement that Jesus made to a woman that came to ask Him to heal her daughter. Jesus was telling her that she had no right to ask for healing, since she wasn’t Jewish. Wisely and remarkably, this woman humbled herself and pleaded for mercy instead of trying to demand her rights. She didn’t have any rights. And when Jesus had mercy on her, she returned home to find her daughter healed. It’s that simple. She received based on Jesus, not on what she deserved.

I loved that this woman was persistent but mostly that she humbled herself instead of arguing with Jesus on why she deserved to have her daughter healed. Her faith was amazing! She recognized that Jesus was the Son of God even though she was not an Israelite. I think that's pretty cool that the light of God showed through Him and people recognized Him by it. God's word says that we, as Christians, are to be recognized by our love, to let our light shine, to be the salt of the earth so that others can see Christ in us.  That's what I hope I am doing by sharing with all of you is letting my light shine so people will be drawn to God.

Some trust in chariots and some in horses, but we trust in the name of the LORD our God. Psalm 20:7

Trust in the Lord with all your heart,
    and do not lean on your own understanding. Proverbs 3:5

For we walk by faith, not by sight.  2 Corinthians 5:7

I cling to God's promises and I know that God is faithful to keep those promises and that he has already put the healing power inside of me. Please pray for miraculous results as well as God helping me to allow the release the life to flow inside of me. Today I was singing the old song that I learned as a little girl and as I try to write the lyrics here, I completely forgot them. That's annoying but it will come to me again. The song just popped into my head this morning as I was praising God for healing me and helping me allow it to be released inside of me. God's pretty awesome!